GLBT Student Leaders: Challenges They/We Face

The last thing I want to do is get up on a soapbox and school anyone on what they “should” consider in their daily lives as practitioners and/or students. I also don’t wish to assume that my readership (likely a small population at this point) is unaware of the dynamics described below. Despite this, I do get the sense that I am privy to some insidious yet often unrecognized patterns of behavior occurring on my, and likely many other, college campuses.

A married lesbian couple approached the GLBT center’s booth the other day at parent orientation. Their presence, sincere smiles, along with vocal support of our services were a respite from the majority of responses received, which routinely come in the form of awkward apathy at best, and at worst blatant disgust. I, along with other seasoned staff and students, routinely prepare the newbies who work the booth for the Center by introducing them to the common and unfortunate scenarios that often unfold when manning a booth that is centered around GLBT-related programs and services.

The first concept we cover is that of the “bubble.” To take away from the hurtful reality of being ostracized, unsupported, and ignored we joke about the bubble being an invisible force field that most people simply will not cross. Parents at parent orientation, and students at student orientation will walk happily down the straight (no pun intended) row of booths for other offices on campus, until they reach ours. It’s at this point that they; A) back away several steps with their heads down; or B) step away and gawk at our program board with a controlled expression of disapproval.

Those that cross the bubble usually do so absent-mindedly to take a piece of candy, or one of the attractive bumper stickers we offer for free. It isn’t unusual for one of these unsuspecting folks to look up, see what table they are at, and walk away as casually as possible. Once people get close enough for some candy we frequently hand them some of our literature with our written mission, and website. Some people immediately and forcefully, as if wronged in some way, hand the material back saying something like, “oh, we won’t be needing this.”

Sometimes individuals are not so casual. For instance, one mother came to our table the other day to take a piece of candy. A student staff politely and enthusiastically asked if she would like to hear about our GLBT student services. She asked what the acronym stood for, and after being told it meant “gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender” she made an unrestrained expression of repulsion, put her hands up as if pushing us away, backed away suddenly and said, “ugh! No thank you, no offense.” …as if there was any other way to feel, but offended, by her response!

Another common and unfortunate occurrence the newbies get prepared for are the distant gawkers. These are the people that will normally not even come close to the bubble, but will stand in the distance pointing, smiling and poking fun. I’ve heard on a few occasions, parents and students daring others in their party to approach our booth as if interacting with us were so unpalatable it could only be desirable as a response to a dare. The “distant gawkers” are close relatives with the “elbow-nudgers,” those that walk by the booth, nudge the person next to them and gesture to our booth as if we are a puppet show there for purposes of amusement.

It’s easy for these micro-aggressions, and even the blatantly insulting behaviors to go unnoticed by those not subjected to it on a regular basis. These situations are DAILY occurrences for students who are out on campus, or who do not conform to gender stereotypes. The students I work with are strong, and they find the humor in the situation, often making light of the barrage of stigmatization they face. While I take part in making light of it as well, I also understand deeply the far reaching negative effects that this kind of dynamic can have on an individual and on a community. I hope you take the effort to be aware of these dynamics, and support those that are subject to them. I can’t tell you how important it is when staff from other booths comes over with words of encouragement, and support. Please reach out to marginalized students; they really do need the extra support!

Can you talk about a time that you noticed micro-aggression, or blatant discrimination? What challenges did you face in dealing with the situation?